Focusing on what is wrong doesn’t change ANYTHING

There are so many angry and frustrated people out there these days; angry about their perceived lack of power they have to affect change, angry about their perceived lack of money, or perceived lack of things, or the shitty people in their lives or …….. fill in the blank.

I noticed that my husband I were watching a lot of news about the political situation here in Canada and the more I watched, the more angry and frustrated I was feeling and actually somewhat helpless to change it. I tweeted tons and tons of tweets hoping that others will read them, share them and that my tweets might actually change something.

But here is the thing.

The more I focus on what is wrong with what is going on in Canada, the more angry I feel, the more powerless I feel and the less likely it is to change. So rather get the relief via expression, I get more of the same.

Focusing on what is wrong doesn’t change anything.

OK shall I repeat that (for me, as well as for you…..)?

Focusing on what is wrong doesn’t change A N Y T H I N G.

So – where does that leave things?

What can I do or be different today to change the future right away? What energy, space and consciousness can I be to be the the change that will create so much more than I could ever imagine beyond my wildest dreams?

What if it is really as simple as that?

I keep writing ‘be the change’ but that message is actually meant more for me than anyone else. If it inspires you to change something, that is awesome.But BEING the change is what I am asking of myself. How does it get any better than that?

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Where more effort might create exhaustion rather than effectiveness….

I came to downhill skiing later in life than most, in my early-twenties. My ex-husband and his family were avid ski enthusiasts so it was join ’em or spend every weekend and winter holiday alone. I love the outdoors so I was up for the challenge.

The first few times I ventured onto the ski hill, I was definitely intimidated. In order to get any speed down the hill, one has to face down hill. Yet the more you face down the hill, the more out of control I would feel. So my ex taught me to traverse across the slope and then hop to turn around other way, which should have worked except for one thing. I was struggling to control my speed and in order to maintain any control, I was fighting the slope of the hill by over hopping and actually almost face up the hill! It was quite amusing to watch. This was extremely effective in keeping me from going out of control but it was also extremely exhausting. By the end of the run I would literally be panting. 

Seriously.

I wondered if there might something I was missing and if there was perhaps an easier way. So I started to experiment. What I discovered was quite simple and a phenomenal metaphor for living. I found that if I leaned into the slope of the hill and allowed gravity to move my body, rather than fighting the slope by hopping up hill, I could actually find a rhythm. The more I surrendered to that rhythm, the easier the skiing became and the more control I had over my skis. It was fascinating because it was opposite to what I had anticipated. It was actually by letting go that I could find my rhythm and enjoy skiing.

I took this metaphor out into my life, whereby letting go of control sometimes allows more mastery in. It has been a super fun learning to apply and I still do, every day.

So I put this question now to you….where does more effort in your life create exhaustion rather than being more effective? And I wonder where letting go might actually create more than you could ever imagine?

Thanks for the inquiry Karen Kimsey-House!

To find the original article, please click here: how-become-world-class-coach-karen-kimsey-house

neverstopquestioning

You want change? BE the change.

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Have you ever had people in your life who have been phenomenal creators of crap? They just love trauma and drama in their lives. You know who I mean…the ones who things continuously “happen” to – either their neighbour’s hot water tank explodes and floods their condo, or their cat gets sick and almost dies, or they are sick for the godzillionth time this year? (Oops, that was me – until a few years ago – I just love poking fun of my old sh*t 🙂

Hey I am a recovering Trauma/drama queen…just sayin’ 🙂 I get it more than you know.

Seriously though – do you have people like that in your life?

Let’s face it: what do YOU know that they have been unwilling to acknowledge?

What if you could be with their choices as simply “an interesting choice to make” and it’s no more significant than that? Have you ever noticed that the more energy you give their “situation”, the more they get proof they are a victim? And you think you are being kind and sympathetic? Have you noticed that actually doesn’t create any change? What if instead, you empowed them to know that it is their choice as to what they do and who they be, with the situations?

Hey, I get it. Sh*t happens sometimes. It is what we choose to be and do with situations that creates our future. There is an energy with every single choice we make. It’s either light or heavy. Our choices today create the energy of our future. Does that make sense?

So the next time you are in front of one of your trauma/drama friends, would you like to try something new? (WARNING: they probably won’t like you after this, since you aren’t aligning and agreeing with how pathetic they are, so if you are NOT ready to lose them, do not do this).

WOULD YOU BE WILLING TO EXPERIMENT?

FIRST -Say to yourself “Interesting choice” and destroy and uncreate anywhere you are aligning with how pathetic and how powerless they are.

Remember – we are not here to change anyone.

THEN, you could say to them “you’re right! That must be horrible for you. I don’t know how you can stand it!” You don’t have to do ANYTHING.

– And then breathe- expand OUT your own energy.

Notice – how much more freedom have you now created for you? What if that space, expansiveness, freedom you be is a highly potent change catalyst, way more potent that aligning and agreeing with them?

What if the world we are creating is actually BEING the change we know is possible? BEING that energy.

Trauma and drama, whether it’s politics, relationships, business, etc. does not create change. It merely creates more of the same. You want change? BE the change.

What else is possible?

So many things come to me when I wake up in the morning!! The thing that I have been becoming more aware of is how uncomfortable most people are in their bodies. I can actually feel their discomfort and used to think it was mine. Cute not always bright. smile emoticon

So –

I am wondering what contribution can I be to people having more ease in their bodies?

Most people don’t get that being present is a choice. We have made so many things acceptable as “normal” distractions – things like money and business and relationship. How many times do you find yourself getting caught up in the significance of all those things and other topics, that actually take your attention away from the moment? How much can you actually change in your life if you aren’t present? How many times have I heard, “well that’s the way we have always done this”? How much can you create your future if you are recreating the past by doing what you’ve always done?

I am searching for those creative movers and shakers who get the possibility of a different future, not based on the past, but based on possibilities, based on joy, based on fun.

Are you that person?

WHAT ELSEIS POSSIBLE?

What if we could truly lower our barriers?

Ladies, you know when you are being lusted after, when you’re in the subway or walking down the street, and you get “the eye”, you know that creepy feeling all of the sudden, and all your barriers come up around you, like a fortress of impenetrable protection, because you think that will stop someone from bothering you whom you don’t want to bother you. And if you are a professional healer, as I am, it’s such a weird energy that comes up and we have been taught we must cut off because we never want to confuse a client with our intentions. But what actually happens when we have barriers up, is that we cut off our awareness.

What if we could truly lower our barriers and in so doing, we never stop being who we are, we never cut off pieces of us and that allows us to know where people are functioning from because we are functioning from awareness?

I am listening to Dr. Dain Heer‘s tele class series on ‘Body Whispering: Your Keys to Conscious Touch: “When your barriers are truly down, you have an awareness of where something undesirable is….you wouldn’t have anybody come to you and do that because you would know before they were there and you would change it.”

I know that goes against everything we have been taught and what we have learned. I have been absoutely stellar in barriers up for most of my life. I am so consciously choosing barriers down, barriers down – being in total awareness so I know – you know – even before – because we are just that smart, capable and aware.

What if we could receive all of that without any point of view, without making it right or wrong or even significant and just say “hi. I see you.”? When we allow our awareness, essentially trust our awareness, no barriers, we will never even get close to any harm. We will know whose energy is kind and caring and whose is not.

Barriers down. Trust your awareness. Everything else is just a way of creating separation.

10_Sept2015

Beer battle: New Brunswick man files constitutional challenge over right to buy cheap alcohol in Quebec

Are you more interested in being right than being aware?

“Anytime you do a projection or expectation, you’re trying to make something personal that isn’t. You’re more interested in being right than being aware.” – Gary Douglas
What I have recently realized with astonishing clarity, is how much I have used projections and expectations to make myself right which then creates separation from others and rejection of me. The freedom in undoing that knot of not only needing to be right, but truly letting go of all projections and expectations, is life changing. Using awareness allows for infinite choice, infinite possibilities. Whereas trying to create from projections and expectations has no choice, no possibilities. 
#freedommeansneverneedingtoberight
#nomoreprojections #nomoreexpectations

Can your past be a contribution to your future?

So recently, someone in a Facebook group I am in asked, “What if your past is actually a contribution towards your future based on your choices and experiences and by sharing those experiences it will make a difference to others?”

True choice is creating now for the future you are creating towards. It is free from projections and expectations that create separation and then rejection of another or of you. You can learn from a choice (choice creates awareness) that either worked well for you or didn’t work well for you, without eliminating your awareness of all future possibilities available now and in the future. 

When a choice is coloured by the past you are being influenced by what happened before instead of being aware and asking the Universe for all possibilities. Ask and you shall receive is completely free from the past.

Absolutely sharing those experiences with others is a way to be a contribution to them! It is all about the energy that you be while sharing it. Are you free from the past or there still an energy sticking you?

Ahhh, that’s the question.

By the way, Gary just so happens to be offering a tele series on this topic at the end of the month. https://www.facebook.com/events/1574979112762914/

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What if you went forward to create your future?

“What if you went forward to find out what you’re capable of creating instead of backwards to find out why you didn’t and why you couldn’t?” – Gary Douglas

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What reality can we each create with every choice we have to choose towards?

We are so funny. Every time we begin any sentence with the word because or include it anywhere in our world we are giving ourselves reason and justification for a choice we made or will make. What if you have TOTAL choice as to whether you buy into the world of cause and effect?

What if all the ‘becauses’ are just an interesting point of view and you actually get to create you every ten second with every choice you have in front of you COMPLETELY FREE from the past and not bound by any because?

That’s my 6 am awareness. 👀😜🌱🌿

So-

If we are completely free to create in any moment, in every moment, (this is where it gets super exciting!!!), what would we like to create? What reality would be fun?

The thing is that you only perceive YOUR reality anyway, right? You can see through YOUR eyes, YOUR filters. You may as well make them fun (unless of course you’re addicted to unhappiness and trauma/ drama, which is fine if THAT is fun for you. 😊)

What reality can we each create with every choice we have to choose towards?